Business of living

It is 10 a.m. and I am still blissfully dressed in my pajamas. However, it is not as lazy as it might sound: I was up from 1 a.m.-5 a.m. with a fussy baby, who proceeded to throw up all over the floor at 7:30 a.m. Which at least helped me understand the sleepless night, I guess. My writing has been so sporadic over vacation, partially because of "vacationing" in an intellectual sense, at least - if not physically, partly because the consequent demands of housewifing and child rearing build up through the semester and reach critical mass when more of my time becomes suddenly available.

The laundry hasn't been caught up since we returned home from South Carolina. Ants are threatening to walk away with all our food (if you have a natural ant repellent suggestion that is non-toxic to pets and children, send it my way). I quite suddenly had to grind 30 pounds of venison scrap this week because we went and picked up the annual side of beef from a local farmer. Extra childcare duties, school review with Katrina, organization for school's start in early September, and curriculum development duties for the newly christened Thul Home School have all demanded time. All that adds up to very little time to write. And a chaotic, shambled household in those awkward teenage stages of the organization project.

In the midst of all these details of normal living, I am busy preparing for a 3-day hospital stay at Mayo-St. Mary's starting September 3rd. I will be worked up for a more specific diagnosis of my dysautonomic syncope (fainting). Hopefully I will emerge with a clear treatment plan. My current medication regimen is working (somewhat) and I am becoming more aware of my triggers and pre-syncope symptoms, so life has improved since mid-July in the fainting department. I am also busy researching adoption and helping to get an Adoption Ministry on it's feet at Cedarcreek, using resources from Steven Curtis & Mary Beth Chapman's Shaohannah's Hope Foundation.

Add to all that chaos weddings, day trips, helping a sibling move, meetings, and park playdates, and it has been a busy month. My anniversary is fast approaching. I hope that in 50 years I still look at my husband and he looks at me like this.

My brother Ben & his wife Megan dance in late July.

One night as I was lying beside my baby girl
Singing her a lullaby to help close out the world
she opened up her eyes and began to stare at mine
then she spoke a word that will never leave my mind

She said, Hey mama, I can see myself in your eyes,
then she drifted off to sleep cuz she didn't realize
that she had touched my heart so deep
that I will forever keep lovin'
not be too busy livin'

I watch her as she plays, stylin' in my dress shoes
Talking on her princess phone saying all the things I do
And I know she is listening and watching me so close
Lord, help me be the mom she needs as I watch my baby grow

For sometimes when we just let life get in the way
The time for makin' memories get lost in the day
Precious are the moments between preschool and prom
And before you know it, the day for leaving comes along

~ Too Busy Livin', Amy Douglas