The Mommy Wars: At the Heart of It

My kids start out life in a magic wonderland peopled by Santa Claus, the Easter bunny, and fairies of all kinds. Some of my Christian friends definitely disapprove. It's only one of a myriad of issues on which opinions vary widely.


Homeschooling is another hot button issue I often find myself in the center of. Moms landing on the public school side of things wonder if our homeschooled children will be adequately sociable, and whether they might not be too attached to their mommies. Homeschool moms wonder how the public school moms can send their kids away for an entire day, day after day, and often assume their children are receiving a superior education due to the small class size.

The truth is, as with any mommy war, our motivation is at the heart of the matter. Take the school debate for instance: public school mamas are often motivated by the fear that they wouldn't be able to keep up with their child's education, nor do they have the training necessary to teach. Homeschool mamas are motivated by the fear of bus rides and long school days, separation prematurely from their babies, and fear of a ho-hum education.

What if we refuse to be motivated by fear, and instead are motivated by love? When we give in to fear, we become defensive about our choices. If we are making a choice out of love, though, we can smile at the world, resting in the knowledge that we've made the best possible choice for our family.

If we are motivated by love - for our family, our community, and our world - the mommy wars will quickly be quieted. How can you change your perspective on your choices from fear to love?

How do you feed, diaper, and teach sleep to your infant? How do you train your toddler? What kind of movies/music do you allow your kids to enjoy? How do you educate your children? What kind of diet does your family endorse? Do you see any of these choices as a "one size fits all" solution? If so, maybe you need to re-evaluate your motivation and be sure you are treating your peers - and your family - with love instead of fear.

On Lisa-Jo's prompt: "Real"