...make your ear attentive to wisdom
and incline your heart to understanding;
yes, if you call out for insight
and raise your voice for understanding,
if you seek it like silver
and search for it as for hidden treasures,
then you will understand the fear of the Lord
and find the knowledge of God.
~Proverbs 2:2-5~
I remember the halcyon days of honeymoon, when joy was like the warm September sun, everywhere, and you didn't have to go hunting for it.
Through child-rearing, and cancer, and brain infections, and long periods of separation, you have to look harder to find the shared joy.
But it is still there, in the moments when you sneak up on your spouse and find him loving on one of the kids, unbidden. Teaching them to find joy in the simple things.
It's there when you catch him caring deeply for the weak little girl, find him celebrating her on her birthday, singling her out for a quiet moment alone.
He prays, and you listen, and through the mess and the busyness, and the chaos where you desire order, it rings through loud and clear: journeying together is not just about the happy moments. And there is joy in all those moments, waiting to be found, like hidden treasure.
Long ago, you thought love meant "happily ever after". But you learn, slowly, as he keeps loving through the hardest of seasons, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and health, forsaking all others...love is sacrifice, abiding, loving you when you are unlovable.
We are on this hunt together, the hidden joy hunt. Hurting together, healing together, helping each other. Joyfully ever after.
Happy Valentine's Day!
Excerpted from my Gratitude Journal, numbers 57-116:
62. Silage steaming in a wagon in morning sun
64. Baby boy spiked blond hair
68. Homemade bratwurst
71. Matthew 18:21-22
79. Yellow damask sling fabric!
86. Hot tea on a raw throat
87. The suffering Psalmist speaks comfort into my lonely day
90. God's cloak of mystery
91. I am not the first to be mystified!
98. Smell of bath night
100. Husband's whiskery kisses
103. Huge wool sweater to hide in
109. Feeling anger
113. A knowing look at church, "I've been there, friend."
115. Crutches.
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