Begging for revival

I have been deaf. Mute. My sense of smell isn't always trustworthy. Sometimes my hands feel numb when I hug you.

Just like salvation, joy is a gift offered me, not infused into me. When joy bombards, I am better now at grabbing hold and not letting go. Hearing everything. Saying everything. Smelling everything. Tasting everything. Feeling the touch.

I've heard it from so many places and so many different faces that I have to hear it as a clarion song calling me to change: you have to feel to reveal. They tell me that if I don't feel through these old memories, they will crash the party again sometime in the future.

And so I feel. Sometimes in silence as my heart breaks. Sometimes I can actually let the tears go. In Psalm 80:5, David asks how long God's anger will remain on His people:
You have fed them with the bread of tears and given them tears to drink in full measure.
That verse is now. But as the Psalm closes, I hear something that makes my blood run cold for a moment, sends shivers up my spine. This one tickles me because it is my prayer, and I know that God answered it for the Jews:
Revive us, and we will call upon your name. Restore us, O Lord God of hosts! Let your face shine, that we may be saved! (vs. 18-19)

Wake up to the morning light
wipe away the lonely nights
let a brand new day wash over you,
Wanna see you smile again
show some love to your crazy friends
wipe your tears away
those days are through

So baby hold on
just another day or two
I can see the clouds are
moving faster now
and the sun is breaking through
If you can hold on, to the one that's holding you
there is nothing that can
stop this crazy love
from breaking through

We're breaking through

Wake up to the rising sun
thank the Lord for the
things He's done
lift your eyes up to the
hope that's ever true
Wanna see you smiling girl
you're a light in this jaded world
wipe away those tears
this one's for you

And the stars are up there
shining for you
oh, the Father does adore you
His love will never change
And you and I
we were born to follow
the hope that will lead us to tomorrow
and no one can take it away
~ Hold On, TobyMac ~