Drinking words

Words from God make us firm and unshakable. The unchangeable nature of God shines through as I study - messages for me scattered through ancient language, the poetry and prose of His Word, spine bent, pages filled with notes. 

I stepped out of God's ranks for just a moment, and eaten from the inside out by Satan's poison in that one moment. It was God's way of showing me with finality that I cannot accomplish one thing without His strength. Even the "easy" days are easy because of His care for me. These days lost in the swamp of my own mind crowd out monuments of faith. I've lost the path. It was a lonely place for days, eons. Slowly I felt the Lion of Judah taking up His stance beside me, paw ready to slap Satan's torment off like a summer mosquito.

Lord, free me of the world's lies. Expectations. Aspirations. Help me to do as you please all through the week. Restore me to my home. Refresh my swamped mind.

I have joined the long defeat
that falling set in motion

and all my strength and energy

are raindrops in the ocean

so conditioned for the win
to share in victor's stories
but in the place of ambition's din
I have heard of other glories

and I pray for an idea
and a way i cannot see
it's too heavy to carry
and impossible to leave

I can't just fight when I think I'll win

that's the end of all belief
and nothing has provoked it more
than a possible defeat

we walk a while we sit and rest
we lay it on the altar
I won't pretend to know what's next
but what I have I've offered

and I pray for a vision
and a way I cannot see
it's too heavy to carry
and impossible to leave
and I pray for inspiration

~sara groves, the long defeat~